End of Days
by phoenix-raine
Summary: Kai's life in the more medieval times at the abbey and his conflicts with his personal emotions. What is his final decision? one-shot fic..


END OF DAYS  
  
The cold mountain breeze wound its way through the students lined up in neat, filed ranks. The children ignored the cold chill the snow-blown breeze sent up their backs as they were taught to, and concentrated only on the fluid, graceful movements of their swords. Wearing only their loose, black cotton pants, and a simple leather vest, they were able to move faster than they would with heavy armor on. Armor was only worn to strengthen their bodies and build up their endurance. On the battlefield, they would wear light, flexible chained metal with a thin leather shirt and matching pants that were designed especially for close combat. The chained metal was made of a dozen sheets of metal flattened and then twisted to make the armor light and suitable for quick movements while the leather had been hardened and tanned by various herbs to thicken the shell and still maintain its original agile maneuverability.  
  
12-year-old Kai Hiwatari formed a void in his mind, focused on perfecting his skills; becoming one with his war sword. He twirled his sword around his head expertly, then side-stepped and blocked an oncoming attack from his invisible enemy before ducking low and dropping to his knees to deliver a simple low kick to knock "him" off "his" feet. He continued practicing with various patterns; the heron meets the fish hawk, the eagle spreads its wings, the cat walks on water. He seemed to dance as he smoothly went through each different exercise with Dranzer, his war sword.  
  
The magnificent four-foot long blade was a beautiful silver sheen two- handed barbarian war sword, hand crafted with the strongest of metals. An artistic solid steel skull design pommel sat atop an exquisite ebony handle. The majestic, yet barbaric, lines added to the sword's wide and deadly appeal.  
  
All the children had been practicing tirelessly since sunrise. Now it was around noon, and Kai was only beginning to feel slightly tired. Beads of sweat lined his tanned face, moistening the leather-braided cord wound around his forehead and its loose ends falling below his shoulders. His short, brown hair was plastered to his face by the sweat. White snow clung to his thin, frozen strands of hair. In almost all aspects, Kai took after his father, General Feniox Hiwatari, but the most unusual difference, were his eyes. While father's eyes were a cold gray, his were a deep mahogany red, and seemed to glow whether Kai be out under the bright sun, or in a deep, dark cave.  
  
Sheathing his sword, Kai was about to draw out his throw knives and practice his accuracy when he heard a voice yell.  
  
"That's enough!" A deep voice shouted, breaking the concentration of all the students. "Ten minute rest, then you will continue your training. Dismissed!"  
  
Grabbing his lunch that was already set out for him by the staircase leading down the mountain and to the Abbey's main building, he went to look for Tala, the closest friend he could have in all his 8 years at the Abbey. Thinking that Tala probably was already heading back to the main building, he jogged to the stairs only to have his way blocked.  
  
"What do you want this time Brett?" Kai hissed at the boy standing in the middle of the little gang. He towered over Kai by a head and was at least two years older as well. He had two golden rings in his left ear, indicating that he was a Class 3 warrior, just like Kai.  
  
"Just because you're the General's son doesn't mean you can threaten me...boy," he smirked. "Hmm... Neith. Faolo." He beckoned to two of his stooges. "Pin him down." They did as they were told, but not before Kai was able to punch them both in the gut and slip past them towards the steps.  
  
"GET HIM!" Brett yelled. They all ran towards Kai, hoping to catch up to him. One of them was actually able to grab the back of Kai's vest, but he squirmed out of it and continued running down the stairs. Two of the gang jumped down, and landed a few metres ahead of Kai. Knowing he wasn't big enough to ram into them, he chose instead to flip above them, land on their backs and kick off. Finally, he felt something crush him from above. His knees gave way immediately, and he found himself pinned down on the floor by Faolo.  
  
"Finally!" Brett exclaimed. "Now, for the prize." He reached behind Kai and unbuckled his sword attached to his back.  
  
"NO! Not Dranzer! That's not yours to take! What makes you think an amateur like _you_ could learn to wield it." Kai hissed.  
  
"You don't think I can use it perfectly? Maybe I'll show you what I can do with it in a few months. Until then, enjoy your misery." He smirked, and was about to walk away when he noticed Instructor Azuriel walking up the steps.  
  
"What are all of you still doing up here?" He snapped. "You classes are almost ready to start!"  
  
"Well sir, you see. Kai, here, continued his training with his sword and we told him classes were about to start, and it wouldn't bode well with Instructor Bierrez if we were all late. Instead of stopping, he ran up to us like a maniac and tried to mutilate us! We are not permitted to injure another student unless we are sparring under Instructor supervision, and so, we could do nothing but run! We managed to pin him down just now. You came just in time sir!"  
  
"Very well. Kai, you will come with me for discipline. Brett, you and your friend go on to your classes. Tell Instructor Bierrez that I held you back. Dismissed."  
  
Brett smirked at Kai one last time before leaving with his gang.  
  
"What are you waiting for? Let's go Kai."  
  
"Yes sir. I'm c-coming..." And in a soft whisper, he said to himself, "I'll get you next time Brett. Don't you worry..."

* * *

Kai painfully limped his way back to the room he shared with Kaema. It was the fourth time he went for discipline that month, and each time, it was because Brett lied about Kai having done something wrong. It always ended up the same way; Brett calmly explaining to the Instructor, while Kai could do nothing but look on. Every time he had tried to interrupt and say his part of the story, the Instructor would always yell at him for interruption and made a point to increase his punishment, so he just let things happen to him now.  
  
Today, Instructor Boris had hung him by his wrists and whipped his entire body a thin leather cord until it was time for the evening meal, which he had "accidentally" missed. Long, bloody gashes ran all around his body. His leather vest soaked entirely through by the crimson blood. He had promised himself he wouldn't cry and show emotion and weakness when he went for discipline, but still, he had felt hot tears streak down his face as each blow came down.  
  
He stopped in front of his door, and slowly pushed it open. A small crack was all that was needed for Toro, Kai's wolf companion, to know that his master had come home. He rushed out the door and knocked Kai off his feet, causing him to wince in pain as he landed on his already broken rib and opening wounds that had just decided to stop bleeding.  
  
Toro whimpered and lowered his head in shame for injuring his master again. Kai took Toro's head in both hands and whispered, "It's not your fault boy, don't worry about me alright?" Toro licked Kai's face lightly, tickling him and set off a fit of giggles from Kai as he continuously licked Kai. In the end, he settled for nuzzling Kai and gently biting his pants, led him into his room where Tala sat on the bed, waiting for him.  
  
"Light! What did they do to you!?" Tala said and quickly jumped out of bed. "Here...lie down. I'll go get you some bandages and water to clean you up."  
  
Toro led him to the bed and Tala helped him lie down, trying his best to cause the least amount of pain for his best friend. Tala grabbed the basin of water by the door, and rummaged through a small trunk on the side of his bed for bandages.  
  
Tala helped Kai sit up, and took off his bloody, leather vest. Wetting a piece of cloth, he gently dabbed at all the whip cuts on Kai's body, occasionally causing him to cringe slightly. While he did this, Toro sat silently by Kai, his head resting on his furry paws on the raggedy mat on the floor, his eyes never leaving Kai. Putting aside the blood-drenched cloth, Tala unwound the bandages and wrapped them around Kai's torso and arms, where the more major cuts were.  
  
Finally laying Kai back down, he placed his hand on Kai's forehead, checking for any increase in temperature like last time. He knew it would be a really bad sign if that happened again. Kai was as helpless as a newborn kitten for those few days he was sick with a high fever, and Tala didn't intend to leave a helpless Kai alone while he had his lessons in case Brett ever came by to "visit".  
  
"Get some rest for now Kai. I'm going to stop by the dining hall and get you something to eat. Toro will still be here, so I wouldn't worry about Brett coming back. Just don't get out of bed!" Tala stated before walking out of their room.  
  
Kai lay awake, his eyes wandering around the room he and Tala had lived in for the past 5 years of his life. He knew every little detail of the room by heart. Without looking around, he knew Tala's bed was exactly two feet away from his, and by their feet on the floor, there was a plain, wooden trunk used to store personal items: clothes, weapons, etc. Behind him would be a small window, about half a foot long and half a foot wide, letting in the few rays of sunlight left before the sunset.  
  
A little bird flew and landed on the ledge of his window, and suddenly, a thought popped into Kai's mind. _'When have I ever been as free as the bird on the window ledge? Free to go and do whatever I please? Without having to go through disciplines for the faults of others? Have I ever been free before? Maybe, just once...'_

* * *

Time Passes...  
  
_Diary Entry #0107...  
  
22nd day of the 5th month_  
  
_**No one seems to care about me. Even Tala and Toro seem so distant lately. Ever since I've risen in rank, they have avoided me like the plague. Sure, I go on a lot of different assignments father and Boris send me on, but being separated for a long time never affected our friendships before. Even when Tala was angry with me, Toro always stayed by my side. I am beginning to think that they only cared about me for what I could do, not who I truly am. Does anyone know who I am, or what I think? Other than the fact that I am the General's only son, but still, does that truly make that much of a difference to the rest of the Abbey? These thoughts are tormenting me; I can't sleep. Night after night, anything I have ever done or said to others, or any of my problems, they all come back to haunt me. I end up back where I started at the beginning; I am alone, and no one and nothing can change this terrible fate of mine.  
  
I think, well...I've been giving this some thought for a while. Maybe, it would be better if I just...died. I mean...who would care? The world just doesn't care about me, or what I do. It would be better with out me. I don't even know what I want in life. Do I truly want to continue with all this killing and purging I have done? But I just can't help myself. I've gone through this over a million times in my head, and each time, I think killing myself will end it all. I would rather have someone beat me to death than live on, feeling all the rejection. I am useless, and pathetic. I don't even try my hardest during my training sessions anymore. What's the use? Sooner or later, I'll die from all the torture sessions. The only thing I doubt is my ability to adapt so quickly. Why was I born with it? It has served me well enough for the past few years, now it won't go away.  
  
I hardly eat anymore... I've tried to starve myself, again and again, eating absolutely nothing but a simple sip of water every morning and night for entire week. But in the end, I give in to my weak stomach; feeding it the food it craved for the past few days. So I start to sleep less. I put more time into my training, draining all my energy form my body, but when I finally succumb to the dark, those whom I always thought would be the first to kill me, always brought me back...always. That was the most concern I have ever received from the likes of the Abbey. Some days I thank them for it, some days I hate them for it. I do not deserve to live.  
  
The Abbey makes sure I stay alive, unfortunately, no matter what it takes. They seem to think that I am the most perfect of all the other students they consider perfect, the one that will lead Sanchia to victory! What makes me so special? How can I be the most perfect of the perfect? That makes absolutely no sense! Or is it really because I am the General's son? I hope not. I really hope not.**  
_  
Kai sighed as he let all these thoughts finally sink in. He was in his own, separate dorm now, after finally earning the right to wear the first golden ring on his right ear, accompanied by the two golden rings on his left ear that proved he had mastered all weapons and hand-to-hand combat. The golden ring on his right ear proved he had the tactical skills and survival for battle during any war or just on the battlefield; titling him as Bashika. Massaging his aching hand, he continued writing ...  
  
**_If I'm so important, why do they treat me like they do? They treat me like...like...I'm their dog! I hold nothing against the canines, but to be treated like one of them!? A little praise does not suffice with me, I never even get praise! I wish to be free of this place, I believe that is what I really want now. To get out of this bloody Abbey and start my life all over; get to see the world! I have never even set foot outside the Abbey grounds, only to the training grounds in the forest and the mountains, nothing more. I have heard some of the newer students mention places like villages and cities. I would really like to see those.  
  
As I was saying...if I am their future savior, why treat me like I am some slave. Sure, they always say that I'll be King one day, if all goes according to plan, but I do not doubt that father will have me killed as well as everyone else in this Abbey to destroy all traces of evidence that prove of the things he had done. I am no future king, nor savior, merely a puppet controlled by the hands of my own father by blood; a tool, nothing more. My father would never share power with anyone, especially me. He has hated me ever since I was born. I never did live up to his expectations. I remember that incident a few years back... I was only 9-years-old, and he expected me to already obtain all three rings of mastery. Heck! Students usually achieve that level at the age of fourteen! Not nine! He had me hung by the wrists for over a week, and personally whipped and beat me! He broke almost every bone in my body that time. I still have those scars, all of them, every...single...one. Those long, white lines... They'll stay with me forever. You'd think he be proud to know that I achieved my third ring two years ahead of everyone else. But he beats me instead, again, because I didn't earn them fast enough. He was furious!  
  
So what if his childhood wasn't perfect. Grandfather never did treat father as a son. Is that why father treats me this way? Like...an experiment? Nothing more than one of the lower blood? I've been watching the little wolf pups, who would soon be trained to be hunters, outside play during my few, short breaks. They seem so carefree, rolling around in the dirt, having such a fun time with each other with no care of the world whatsoever. Can I still be like that? So...cheerful? I once dreamed of a different childhood, to live a different life. Could I have had a childhood without all this pain and suffering I have known my entire life? Maybe I could, that is, if father wasn't so involved with Grandfather's plans, and forget about the power, maybe...just maybe, he would treat me more like his son, rather than a lowly lab rat. But these are mere fantasies. Why do I even bother with these thoughts of mine. Father will never change, so I best forget all this happened. To think that I love the man I call father, yet he barely acknowledges me, except to test my trained skills, torture me if he really didn't like what I didn't or did do, and when I experiment for him his newfound war machines, weapons and training equipment. Using me, he made sure everything he set up was suitable for usage. He wouldn't risk the lives of all the other children, yet he would risk his only son's.  
  
Love...it is a weak emotion. It clouds your judgment, and makes you do stupid things. I had tried to show my father how much I cared and wanted to help him out, but he brushes me off every time. Why do I even bother loving this father? He has done nothing for me for him to deserve anything else from me. I want nothing to do with him ever! I want to rip out his heart, feel the break of his neck, and tear him limb by limb; all by my bare hands. But vengeance, I know, will not satisfy me, not until every living person who worked for the Abbey dies by my hand alone. Dranzer and I, we thirst for blood; to feel the delicate snap of a bone and the warm, oozing blood. A killer I was brought up to be, and taught to be by instinct, and a killer I shall be, 'til the end of my days.  
  
But still...what can I do alone? I am no match against all the students of the Abbey. Anger will get me nowhere, and again, it brings me back to my loneliness. Maybe, I can try sneaking off the Abbey grounds, and just let myself get caught. Maybe then, I can find the peace I seek when death comes for me. Maybe...  
_**  
Kai was putting away his feathered quill when his father barged into his small room.  
  
"What do you think you're doing!" General Feniox snarled. "Writing a diary are we? How pathetic. Is this how you contained your...emotions? In a stupid little book? I thought I told you before; emotions are weak! Must I remind you? Foolish with me, now!"  
  
He grabbed Kai's wrist tightly, and pulled him out of his room.  
  
"NO! Let go of me! Give me back my book! Father!"  
  
"Don't ever call me that, boy." He snarled back.  
  
Kai whimpered and bit back a sob. Unfortunately, his father heard this and drew back his hand and hit him straight across the face.  
  
"Don't even start crying boy. I will not tolerate this kind of childish behavior. You are a Bashika now... finally! And you will start behaving like one."  
  
He led Kai down deep, dark staircases, and finally stopping at one to open the thick, heavy wooden door. The rusty hinges creaked as Feniox swung the door open and didn't even bother to close it. He picked up a long, thin, leather whip and barked out orders to Kai.  
  
"Take off your shirt now! Or I will whip it off for you."  
  
Kai did as he was told immediately, knowing the consequences of going against orders. Even before he could toss his shirt onto the floor, he felt a sharp sting cut across his entire back as General Feniox lashed out the whip again. This time, coiling the leather whip around Kai's ankles and pulling him down, face first. He smiled as he brought the whip down against Kai's tender skin, aiming and striking perfectly at the hollow of his lower back. As it connected he saw Kai stiffen. Instead of screaming, he hissed out the breath in his lungs, his muscles twitching and shuddering.  
  
Kai couldn't believe the pain that lash caused him. He could feel the burning sensation as the whip fell away. He could also feel a warm liquid spill down his back as the broken skin and muscle gave up the red liquid as his own heart beat it out. He shuddered, as the sting seemed to travel up his spine.  
  
Feniox, still angry at the attitude Kai had displayed earlier, gave a furious cry and struck once more. His anger had made him miss the target, but the whip still cut Kai from his left shoulder down to his right hip, cutting the edge of his trousers at the same time. The cloth was wet with Kai's blood and it tore away easily. He brought the whip down as hard as he could on Kai's back, then flipped him back onto his back, and ripped off more flesh and letting more blood spill from his front.  
  
Kai's screams echoed throughout the short hallway that connected the torture chamber with the cells, followed by one of many loud crashes that sounded like a sassing snake, starting loud and ending soundless, always short and fast. Someone that was silent enough to look through the keyhole without anyone noticing would only be able to see a red glow and quick flashes of something cutting through flesh.  
  
Kai groaned, every inch of his body felt like it was on fire. His back and front were one bloody mess of ugly black welts and lacerations. Angry red lined crossed his torso and back, blood flowing freely where it had torn his pale skin. HE didn't even want to know what injuries he had. Every once in a while, Kai would give up a violent tremor, and he would cough up blood. Soon, the area around Kai was completely covered in a deep, crimson red. Feniox wrinkled his nose in disgust, and threw down the whip.  
  
"You will do better than to show weakness next time boy. The pain will come more often now. You are still screaming. I will train you to not even wince under a whiplash." And he strode out of the room.

* * *

Several years later...  
  
17-year-old Kai lay awake, tossing and turning in bed. He couldn't get those words and images out of his head. Just earlier that day, Feniox had approached him, and then led him into a room he had never discovered before. Having lived in the Abbey practically his entire life, he thought he knew it inside out. Apparently, there were still a few secret passages he had yet to find. What he found through those doors almost made his jaw drop, almost.  
  
**Flashback...**  
  
**_A throng of women, children and soldiers of all ages crowded the room. Many were bleeding from various cuts. A few lay motionless on the blood-covered floor, lifeless as the dead. In one corner, he had a glimpse of a Bashika bringing down his hammer onto the head of an old man, cracking open his skull, and spilling out its contents; ending his life.  
  
'What did these people do to deserve such horrors? Surely the rumors aren't true? These cannot be the prisoners of Lorna Rae. Impossible!' He thought to himself.  
  
"These felons are of the lower blood. Take up your sword and slay them all! These are your orders from the General. It is but an experiment, but we must know what you would do."  
  
Kai hesitantly drew out Dranzer and looked all around him. He did not want to kill them, but it was his duty. Forming a void in his mind, he blocked out all his emotions, and became one with his sword. He danced through the patterns gracefully, slitting the throats of everyone so as to give them a quick painless death...  
_**  
**Flashback ends...**  
  
'A war? Why didn't father ever mention this to me? Aren't I trustworthy enough? He once told me I would play an important piece in his plans, but maybe this isn't that plan. I wonder... will he ever see me as his son, and not just an instrument in his schemes? I need to know. I need to know what he has planned for me.'  
  
He quietly got out of bed, quickly pulling a shirt over his head and mouthing a silent "stay" to Toro. He opened a small crack in his door, inspecting the halls for any night guards patrolling for intruders and run aways. Kai slipped out silently, using the shadows as his cover and carefully shut the door behind him. As quiet as the silence of the night, he walked down countless corridors, every once in a while turning this way then that. The dimly lit halls cast long shadows, allowing him to blend in even more.  
  
Finally reaching his destination, he took out a pin in his pocket, and slowly picked at the lock separating him from the answers he sought. He heard a soft click, and allowed himself to enter the large room. In the center, lay a large, circular table covered with the map of the world. Off to one small side of the room, lay several smaller rectangular tables littered with maps. Kai looked down at the world map, and found a few smaller, porcelain figures.  
  
'What do these represent?' He shrugged and let his eyes wander around the map. A mere few inches from his left hand, he found a small stack of notes. Pulling out a chair, he sat down and quickly skimmed through everything. His normally calm exterior suddenly flashed to an angry shade of red. He ground his teeth in irritation as he finally realized what its contents were. They were plans, his father's plans for world domination, and what he would do to help his father achieve that goal.  
  
"Burn down villages, plunder, kill; anything that would capture more land for General Feniox and His Excellency, honor and praise to His Excellency. Why would I do such things!? I have caused enough bloodshed! How much more is needed?" Kai shouted out in his frustration.  
  
"My my. Haven't we changed?" General Feniox said slyly as he practically glided into the room. "I see you have discovered my plans, yes? It is about time you know of the advents that will take place in a few weeks time. I will give you the charge of a small regiment of twenty. The villages you pass by in Lorna Rae are free to your disposal. Kill or keep the humans alive. It really does not matter to me. But then again, a few new slaves wouldn't be so bad. Mhmm? Study these maps carefully Kai, you never were really good in geography." He smirked.  
  
Thoughts raced through the back of his head. 'Should I? Or should I not?"  
  
"If you do this for me, these last few missions, I will consider releasing you from your services. You have done much for me during these last few years."  
  
"You have yourself a deal, General Feniox..."

* * *

Preparations for their journey into Lorna Rae were made as soon as Kai made the deal with his father. He left by horse with his company while Toro trailed behind. He had chosen each and every one by himself. Many were acquaintances prom his past, others, those he knew were the no nonsense type and would make sure that the mission objectives were carried out. Their sizes ranged from tall and muscular, to short and scrawny, and each individual had proven themselves worthy in battle time and time again. One thing they all had in common though, were their cold, emotionless stares. They had their emotions beat out of them when they were little children, but unlike Kai, they remained emotionless.  
  
They took the Queen's Pass down to the gates of Lorna Rae. Being the ever so friendly kingdom, Lorna Rae welcomed them with open hands, allowing them to go through the gates without even an inspection. They didn't even question why a large band of mean-looking, weapon-carrying riders rode into their borders.  
  
'This shows how naïve these low bloods are. They wouldn't recognize danger even if it were right in front of their eyes. Pathetic...Hah! I'm starting to sound like my father.' He snorted.  
  
"We ride south from here," Kai told his company. They merely nodded in acknowledgement and trod off with Kai in the lead.  
  
They stayed on the road for a short time before turning off onto the flat, grassy plains of Lorna Rae. They rode hard, wanting to reach their destination sooner. They had much to do during their one-week ambush. After that, General Feniox would finally let loose his soldiers; some sent to capture Lorna Rae, others to Kaima, and the rest to Aerkurn. The band rode in silence and Kai kept to himself, deep in his own thoughts.

* * *

"When me older, mommy, I'm going to see entire world!" Declared the young 5- year-old boy.  
  
"Well well well. I guess we have a little adventurer in our family don't we now?" Lisha Perkan smiled kindly back at her son and ruffled his loose, golden hair. He giggled and hugged his mother.  
  
"Stars look poo-ty tonight." He stared in awe at the white sparkles in the dark night sky. Looking downward from the house roof, he noticed small shapes trotting slowly down the hills eastward from the village.  
  
"Mama! Mama! What does?" He pointed to them.  
  
Shifting her gaze towards what her son pointed at, she made out riders, brandishing swords and lit torches, her eyes widen in terror as she realized that her village would soon be attacked.  
  
"GUARDS! We're under attack! Everyone wake up!" She screamed, grabbed her son, and got up and ran downstairs.  
  
"Stay here under the trap door alright Jan? Please. Be a good boy and listen to mommy. Don't come out, no matter what. Whatever you hear, don't come out!"  
  
"Why mommy? Is this a game? But I thought you didn't like me playing games at night before I went to sleep."  
  
"Yes. This is a game Jan. Now be good. I don't want anyone to find you. That's the point of the game, for no one to find where you are hiding. Can you do that for me?"  
  
"Yes mommy. Jan is good hider. He won't let other kids find him." He smiled and puffed out his chest.  
  
"That's a good boy, Jan." She patted him lightly on the head and closed the door.

* * *

"Do not avoid notice. That is not the objective of this mission. Kill most of the villagers. Leave a few to spread the news. Lorna Rae will know. We are to deliver the message with any means possible, not to slaughter every human being. Let them rally their forces. The world will know the wrath of Sanchia! ATTACK!" Kai shouted and charged into the center village, slashing and burning the villagers and their homes.  
  
His company sent a wave of terror through the populace and they ran about in confusion and fear; screaming and pushing their way around the crowd, trying to get away from their executioners. Their bodies were hacked at, cut, slashed, and chopped into several pieces. Women and children screamed, as they were the easiest among the villagers to be killed. The men fought bravely, but hopelessly. The Shaden Nai were more powerful and skilled than them, and most of the villagers barely had time to even pick up their weapon before the Shaden Nai ended their life with a single stroke.  
  
The village was alight with red and orange flames, licking the wooden, and turning it into ash. The villagers had hardly put up a fight, and never really had time to react. Bodies lay burning and mutilated on the floor and several were kept in cages, surprisingly still alive.  
  
"Let loose the prisoners Tabir. Now listen up you fools. We have spared your lives for now. Now spread the word. Let all of Lorna Rae know the Shaden Nai will come and hunt them down, slay them, savor the sweet taste of her children's blood. We will bring this nation down on her knees, begging for mercy. And we shall not give it. Now go, before I change my mind and kill you as well." He grinned, picked up the nearest villager and flung him away from the fire. The rest quickly scampered off in the same direction, running as if the Shaden Nai were chasing after them.  
  
_'What has gotten over me? I-I-I...enjoyed it. Just like how I enjoyed it when I killed all those innocent prisoners back at the Abbey. What have I turned into? M-my father? NO! I won't believe it. H-h-he's a monster, I'm...I'm a puppet; his puppet. I have to stop killing. I can't take this anymore!'_ He screamed inside his head and lashed out at the nearest standing person. His sharp sword Dranzer cut the unfortunate Shaden Nai in half. His torso bled and bled, his organs slowly spilled out with the help of the slippery red liquid. His legs stayed standing in one spot before it too slowly fell to the floor, bones protruding outward and crimson red blood escaping from the gaping wound.  
  
"Bloody hell! Kai! Do you realize what you have just done? You've killed a fellow Shaden Nai! You will pay for murdering one of our kin, be you our captain or not!" They all shouted and cursed at him for his murderous act. Unsheathing their swords, they charged at him, their emotionless eyes flickering with the flames of vengeance.  
  
Finally realizing what he had done, he jumped off his stallion and sliced at the defenseless legs of the other stallions, bringing down the riders with them. A few were crushed underneath their stallion and lay unconscious, small pools of blood forming underneath the few unlucky soldiers who landed on their heads.  
  
No one in the Abbey could match Kai in his combat skills, speed, strength, and endurance, and none of those that stood before could either. He knew that, they knew that, but they outnumbered Kai and they used their advantage. They attacked him from all sides, but he would jump out of the circle they created around him, and strike them from above. He threw his still-lit torch at one, burning him on the spot, and threw a fast-acting poisonous dart at another's neck, causing him to start coughing up blood and suffocating on it before falling to the floor. Standing outside the circle, he side kicked another, causing him to stumble, and sliced off his head.  
  
"It was wrong to listen to father's orders and kill all these people." He snarled. 'Wait! What did I just say!?'  
  
"Wrong Kai? There is no wrong when you kill a low blood, only justice! We are cleansing the world of those who are inferior, those who are plaguing the world with their filthy lives! If you defend these low bloods, you are one of them. You shall die Kai!"  
  
Tabir charged at Kai, sword upraised. Sparks flew as the two blades intersected, the slender, black-bladed Ravenna sword being turned aside by the parry of the heavier, silver war sword. Their wielders backed off slightly, eyeing each other. The warm spring breeze wound its way around the two combatants, ruffling one's hair and the other's long black cloak. The two opponents stood still for a few seconds, each watching the other, waiting for their foe to make the first move.  
  
They broke as one, both advancing, blades clashing with the solid ring of metal on metal. Dranzer's wielder came across in a slash, to which the blonde's sword Cothen rose to block. Dranzer deftly rose over the blocking blade and knocked it down. Even as the Cothen's wielder began to bring his weapon back up, Dranzer weaved underneath the blade and slammed up. Cothen, already with the momentum of rising up, went flying high out of its wielder's hands at the strike. The weapon spiraled up into the air, turning end over end. Its wielder quickly leaped back out of the brunette man's range, but his foe didn't advance. He simply stood there, Dranzer at his side, as he waited for the Ravenna sword to drop back down.  
  
"You need to learn to tighten your grip," he remarked to his foe with a superior smirk.  
  
Tabir took a step to the side, observing Cothen and where it would land. The weapon reached the apex of its flight and came down, end over end. It drove down into the ground, standing straight, with the handle up. A rumbling blast of thunder emerged from the clouds above as lightning flashed, illuminating the battlefield for an instant. Then, rain began falling upon the two warriors, drenching them and quenching the burning village behind them.  
  
The blonde haired man glanced back up at his foe and then reached down for his weapon. His hands closed around the custom-made grip, and he pulled the unique hybrid weapon out of the ground. Drawing Cothen and feeling the familiar, solid weight of the Ravenna sword in his hands, Tabir turned to his foe. Dranzer still waited by his side, the smirk still on his face as he waited for the duel to resume.  
  
"Come on, let's get this over with," Kai said. Tabir nodded, then raised his Ravenna sword and charged. The young brunette warrior grinned and his own weapon rose to point at his foe.  
  
The two dueled ferociously, blades clanging and scraping in the spring air. Dranzer and Cothen met repeatedly, sparks rising and falling at each intersection. Dranzer's wielder backed away quickly, and came back in, pulling a dazzlingly fast spin. Dranzer came around fast and hard, but Cothen came in behind the slash, striking at Kai. He spun around quickly and back, away from the slash. Dranzer came out of the spin striking down on the Ravenna, knocking it down and away. Cothen's wielder came back in, his sword slicing down at the brunette, who stepped forward and unexpectedly ducked under the blow, ending up behind the blonde-haired wielder. Tabir spun around quickly to face his opponent, who stood calmly. Kai held Dranzer straight up at shoulder level, smirked again, and then raised his left hand, beckoning with his fingers.  
  
Cothen's wielder accepted the offer and charged, only to see Dranzer come down from its perch by the brunette's shoulder and thrust out. Tabir couldn't parry in time, and he felt a sharp pain as the silver blade was forced into his side, blood surging out of its wound. Stumbling backwards, he couldn't believe that Kai was the first to draw blood, and that the murderous traitor had injured him.  
  
"Twice more, Tabir. Twice more will I draw blood. Then you shall taste your own blood after I slice that pretty neck of yours." Kai grinned wildly.  
  
"Good," the brunette said. "This is going to be fun." The smirk on his face and a dangerous glint in his eyes told the blonde warrior that despite the "fun" his foe was having, he did not at all consider it to be a game.  
  
"Well, are you just going to stand there!? Do not be amazed, fool, that I drew blood frist. I am the superior warrior." Dranzer's wielder smirked. "Come on!"  
  
Cothen responded to the challenge with an overhead cleave, to which Dranzer blocked. The brunette disengaged his blade from the Ravenna, and then smacked the weapon across into the Ravenna, forcing the weapon aside. Tabir backed away as Dranzer came up in a rising slash, and then another rising strike, both aimed for his neck or head. The first swing missed as the blonde fighter backed away, but the following slice didn't. Tabir's abdomen had been cleanly cut vertically downwards, and already, blood seeped through his simple cotton shirt.  
  
"Enough of this!" Kai hissed through clenched teeth as his enemy backed away. "Time to end this."  
  
Cothen's wielder came back in again, Ravenna behind him and ready for another powerful slash.  
  
"Dodge this!" Dranzer's wielder shouted as he flung something towards Tabir, a silver glint leaving his sleeve, shooting across. Tabir barely had any time to respond before the throw knife buried itself in his chest, leaving him standing there in shock.  
  
_'Is this how I will die? At the ends of a traitor?'_ Cothen's wielder thought to himself. _'I should have seen that dirty trick coming...'_  
  
Even as this thought went through his mind, training kicked in, telling him to get up and on his feet before his opponent took advantage of the moment of weakness. The blonde warrior began to rise, only to see his foe towering above him, Dranzer raised high.  
  
'Oh, damn...' he thought as he saw the look of insane glee in his foe's eyes.  
  
Then, Dranzer slashed down across the warrior's neck. Blood streamed out of the wound and stained the ground. Tabir started to choke on his own blood as it started to come out of his mouth. The cut was not too deep, as it was intentionally cut so Tabir would slowly bleed to death. The warrior turned his attention back up to his enemy, who stood there, smiling. Rage twisted its way onto the blonde warrior's features, and he struggled to get up. His fingers tightened around his Ravenna sword handle, but he stumbled trying to stand up. Then things got hazy, and darkness engulfed Tabir as he fell back to the ground. His Ravenna clattered down beside him, the sound of metal on stone the last sound he heard before he faded into darkness, never to wake up again.  
  
Kai brought his war sword up to swipe off Tabir's head, but the sound of Toro howling into the night finally brought him back to his sense.  
  
"Wha-what...what? Tabir? Oh no...what have I done? I really am turning into father. No..."  
  
Sheathing his sword unconsciously, he dared to take a glimpse of what he had done. Limp, lifeless bodies lay scattered around him. The bodies of his former comrades were mutilated, covered in their own blood.  
  
Years of emotions that lay dormant within him resurfaced in the form of crystal-like tears as they trickled down his perfectly tanned face. The guilt finally came, after killing so many innocents. He had always found pleasure in killing and hearing the screams of his victims. Now, it all seemed like those pleasures were but mere thoughts of his imagination. Not able to take in the repulsive sight any longer, Kai ran. He ran like there was no tomorrow. He didn't know or care where he ran. As long as it was away from that burial ground he had just created moments ago, and away from Dosai Abbey, where everything stemmed from.  
  
Pretty soon, he found himself running deeper and deeper inside a forest. Twigs and all sorts of underbrush snapped underneath the pounding of his feet, low branches hung overhead, and yet he still ran into them, ignoring the small cuts that soon began to appear more frequently all over his body. He didn't care what happened to him outside in this vast forest. Nothing could compare with the pain he had caused to others over the years; nothing.  
  
The thick stench of human blood still lay heavy on him, attracting all sorts of animals towards him, and yet, they all kept their distance from the anguished warrior running through their territory. An understanding seemed to pass through all of them. As long as the animals left Kai alone, no harm would be done to them. If they did, then let gods have mercy on their poor souls. He would show them no mercy.  
  
Noticing a river up ahead, Kai was forced to slow down and he flung himself on a large rock that jutted out of the ground and hung halfway over the river, finally allowing himself time to let everything really sink in. He let his tears flow freely down his face, unable to take the pain from within any longer. He stared at his reflection in the gracefully flowing mirror-like river. The rain, having stopped just a short while ago, let the clouds spread apart and show off the beautiful full moon, lighting up the small clearing. He remembered the last time he cried, shivering at the mere thought of it. Nothing was pleasant whenever he cried. He never cried out in happiness, only kept behind those barred doors in times of pain and indignity.  
  
He shrieked out loud, like a wild creature of the night as he writhed in pain and agony on the cold, rocky ground. Emotions he had held back for so many years broke through the barrier he had kept buried deep within, and he felt the guilt of his wrongdoings. He relived the fear and hatred from his tortures in the Abbey. The tears kept on coming, like a cool springs leaking out of a crack in the mountainside, forming a little pond, and getting bigger by the moment. All those painful memories came back to him; the torture, the pain, the loneliness...  
  
**Flashback...**  
  
**_'Don't you know better than to talk back to me boy! Fool! You may be the General's son, but the status of a student's hierarchy does not apply in my Abbey. Deirdre, do with him as you please. You'll have plenty of time with him. A week in the cells; you have until then for your... fun.' Feniox grinned evilly and punched 10-year-old Kai hard in the stomach, causing him to have the wind knocked out of his lungs, and dark specs of light to start clouding his vision. Taking advantage of his moment of weakness, Feniox struck him hard across the face with the back of his hand, sending Kai flying across the room. Blood trickled its way out of his mouth, landing a few drops on Feniox's hand.  
  
Snarling in disgust, he wiped the back of his hand on the back of Kai's shirt. 'Remember Deirdre, do not kill him. He is an important piece on the chessboard. This time, mark him. He has the qualifications, having received both of his rings at such an early age." With that, he strode away, out of the cold, cellar room.  
  
'Yes sir,' Deirdre whispered to himself. Grabbing the semi-conscious Kai by the collar, he dragged him out of the cellar, who, surprisingly, didn't resist, and down a few flights of stairs before reaching their destination; the torture chambers. Tossing Kai aside, Deirdre went straight to the armory. He chose the strongest pair of shackles he could find, along with a strongest & thickest rope and collar with sharp spikes on the insides attached to a long, leather leash. He picked up his favorite torture weapon, the cat o' nine tails. It was a long leather whip, split into nine separate thin whips with sharp, hooked nails attached to the ends; hence the name, cat o' nine tails.  
  
'Now where is that iron stick? Feniox told me to mark him with the Dosai Abbey emblem, and I'll make sure he remembers every moment of it.' He laughed to himself. He rummaged through a box of weapons, finally finding the iron rod that would indicate Kai was a student of the Dosai Abbey. Used only on those that Feniox considered worthy, and strong enough that the Abbey knew they would be perfect with a few more years of endless hard training. The devilish falcon burn mark would stay with him, all the way to his grave.  
  
With the rope, shackles, and leash & collar in one hand, cat o' nine tails and iron rod in the other, Deirdre walked out of the armory back to where he had tossed Kai, slowing his pace when his eyes found the shivering boy on the floor.  
  
'He's afraid?' The older boy lifted his eyebrow in doubt, and hoisted Kai onto his shoulders. He chained him to the wall with the shackles, and was surprised when he felt a knee connect with his nose as he bent down to chain the ankles. Deirdre heard a crack in his nose on impact as he fell back onto the hard, stone floor. He spat out the blood collecting in his mouth and clutched his broken nose.  
  
'Why, you little –,' he didn't finish his sentence as he struck Kai across the face and side-kicked his shin. Catching him off-guard, Deirdre quickly attached the spiked collar onto his neck and gave the leash a sharp tug. Kai immediately straightened as the spikes dug into the tender skin of his small neck. His breath came in short gasps as he desperately tried to refill his lungs with much needed oxygen.  
  
Deirdre tossed the hot iron rode into the blazing fireplace opposite of Kai's cell and picked up his cat o' nine tails.  
  
'The iron won't heat up for a while, but until then, my little kitty here will entertain you with her little claws.' He snickered before bringing down the cat o' nine tails down on Kai's evenly tanned tender skin.  
  
He made sure that the nails dug into his skin before ripping it out with one smooth motion. Kai merely hissed as pain shot down his entire back. The nails got caught near the top of his exposed back and ripped off several pieces of flesh that would leave scars on his back all the way down to his waist. Deirdre continually brought the whip down on his back, each time, ripped off more chunks and pieces of flesh, but not once did Kai scream aloud.  
  
'Scream for me you pathetic mongrel!' Deirdre shouted and yanked hard on the leash, causing Kai to feel blood enter his mouth and drip down his neck.  
  
Finally, on what seemed like the millionth stroke on his body, Kai let out a cry of pain, his screams echoed in the empty cell.  
  
'Ahh...the sweet sounds of pain.' Deirdre grinned wickedly. 'Too bad I can't hear that one again. I'm afraid you won't see my little kitty friend again for a while. I'm taking out the hot iron. She'll burn brightly on that bloody back of yours.'  
  
Kai lifted his tired head and watched in terror as Deirdre dropped his cat o' nine tails and took the hot iron out of the roaring inferno. His eyes widened in fear as Deirdre slowly walked closer and closer towards him. He started thrashing about in his chains, trying to break free, but to no avail.  
  
'I must be careful to not ruin this beautiful insignia. Feniox would be most displeased.' He chuckled.  
  
Lifting the hot iron closer to Kai, Deirdre slowly placed it on the top- left corner of his back; enjoying the screams it brought Kai.  
  
'AAAAAAAH!!!!!!' Kai screamed, but Deirdre wouldn't let go, the hot steel burned the flesh of Kai while Deirdre laughed as hard as could. For Kai, the laughter was ear piercing and it sounded like it could be heard on the moon. Kai felt Deirdre lift up the stick off his now burning back and saw how he threw it back in the fire. It was finally over.  
  
'Now that that's over with,' he smiled. 'Let's get on with the festivities. I still have to show you to your new bed. I'm sure the nails will make you feel most comfortable. And don't forget, I still have a beating session for you lined up in your long list of fun times of pain. Now, let's start with leg. It doesn't look broken to me. Hmm...I guess I'll just have to break it for you...slowly.'  
  
Kai didn't think he could take any more pain. He was already half-conscious from the blood loss he suffered from the whippings, and added with the pain of a broken leg; he didn't think he would make up. He struggled to keep awake, trying to show Deirdre he was tougher than it seemed, but when he felt Deirdre slowly hammering a nail into his tibia, he knew he wouldn't last any longer. The last thing he heard was his own scream as the nail penetrated his bone, and breaking it into two...  
_**  
**Flashback ends...**  
  
His body was wracked with sobs as he tried to shake all those images going through his head. Absently reaching back and touching his scar, he quickly recoiled and once again, broke down as a new wave of tears came down.  
  
_'So that's what it's like. To be the victim...' _He thought to himself. _'And all that time, I thought they really didn't feel any pain and were only faking it. Why didn't I notice this before?'_  
  
Kai knew he was a killer by instinct; by blood. He couldn't help it, and yet still, there were those two soft voices in the back of his head to consider now. They just came out of nowhere. One told him to forget the past, and move on. _'Who said you can't start living the normal life you know you've dreamed of before? Turn away from your evil past! You cannot live your life in the shadows forever!'_ It shouted. The other, telling him that he couldn't change what has already been done. _'If you turned back now, no one from the Abbey would forgive you. They'd probably turn on you at once and kill you on the spot for betraying them. Besides,' that little voice hissed, 'who would welcome a cold-blooded murderer in open arms? After all you've done to them, you think they would forget? Just like that?' _It laughed evilly.  
  
Kai let his body fall limp as he listened to the two voices bickering at the back of his head. As his hands fell, he felt , brush his hands.  
  
_'My dagger! I forgot I still had it. Do I have my other weapons then?'_  
  
Searching for any other weapons still attached to him, he found Dranzer, his war sword, tucked safely in its sheath, and numerous throw knives up his sleeves and tucked into his boots by leather straps. Something shiny, softly glowing under the moon's gaze and Kai set his eyes once again on his unique falcon claw dagger.  
  
The falcon's head and neck provided as the handle of the dagger with its beak protruding outward at the tip. A small, talon-like blade curved inward, while the larger talon blade curved inward in the opposite direction.  
  
He gazed lovingly at his dagger, a gift from his mother before she passed away, slowly dragging his finger down the sharp blade, and cutting a small line of blood. Suddenly, that sharp blade looked surprisingly...inviting; a comfort almost, an answer to all those questions racing through his head because of those two voices.  
  
_'This blade could slice through my skin and cut open my wrists. I could bleed to death, and no one would notice; no one would care. Is this how I want it? I'll see mother again, and I won't see father ever again. At least, not until the day he dies, and the gods know how much I wish for that to happen. But what holds me back? Toro!?'  
_  
He spun around, and met face to face with his wolf companion.  
  
"You followed me here. Why?"  
  
Toro merely licked his best friend's tear stained face and nuzzled him gently.  
  
"I know I am being unfair to you, after all those years. You stayed with me. No matter what, you stayed by my side. And for that my old friend, I release you from my friendship. No longer will you have to stay with me, no longer will you have to wait in a small room everyday until they set me free from my torturous prison. I have been a burden on your shoulders from the first day I met you. I was the one who caused you to have that scar on your eye. If it weren't for me, you wouldn't have got that. Please Toro, I beg of you. Leave me be, let me stay here on my own, and never return to Sanchia, or Lorna Rae. Go somewhere far away, like Kaima, or Melecia. They have many forests and mountains for you to roam in. This is all I ask."  
  
Kai smiled fondly at Toro, the silver furred wolf whimpering softly at what he was told to do. They did naught but enjoy the company of one another as they basked in the moonlight for the last time. Finally, Toro got up to leave, slowly jogging away, occasionally casting back his head to watch his friend slowly disappear out of his sight, to be lost forever.  
  
When Toro finally left his sight forever, Kai let out the breath he didn't realize he had been holding back. Picking up his falcon claw dagger, he slowly drew deep gashes in both of his wrists. Blood oozed and dripped off his wrists, turning the crystal clear water into a scarlet red.  
  
"Death..." He whispered to himself. "It is my light, and my end..."  
  
The last words he spoke before he slipped into darkness, allowing the grim reaper to come and take him away...


End file.
